Masochist

Love and happiness are so overrated. They say love is built over time. And that's true. I used to hate my suffering, but I've learnt to love it. Happiness must be so boring. So light. So smooth. So soft. I'll keep the darkness and heaviness of suffering and loneliness. I've grown fond of it. The difference between loneliness and solitude is that the former contains sadness and the latter contains happiness. I've always tried to transform my loneliness into solitude, but not anymore. I don't want the boredom of love or solitude. I don't want to live the illusion of happiness. Sadness is much more real and palpable. I love this masochist creature I've become.